Losing the Edge

The time has come for the babies of ‘89.

I am turning twenty tomorrow, just one syllable. It is but a number… And in all those years on Earth, I haven’t discovered the meaning of ‘but’ in the previous sentence.

I think I’ve had a pretty big week in the life of my mind; I’ve said some things that I can’t take back, but may have not been phrased or as well thought out as I’d have liked. It has caused me to wonder.

In the next ten years I’ll find out where I’m going with my life. I want to learn to make the right decisions; I want to see if I can belie my right palm and separate my head and heart; I want to find purpose to this life instead of accumulating knowledge. I want to challenge myself, step out of my comfort zones and learn to trust my gut rather than past successes. I want to find the right balance of things that will make me happy to the core, because I know if I do this, I’ll know that I can do things right at last.

I want to grow up quickly so that this can happen. At the same time I must be patient and trust that everything will fall into place eventually if I do it slowly.

It is still an exciting age to be alive, and the only edge being lost is the ‘teen’ syllable.

Holiday TODOs

Yeah so obviously to fill in my spare time I need to do stuff, and that would involve making a list to make sure I achieve something.

I must:
- Fold the Last Waltz, and perfect it quite badly.
- Read Brukner & Khan cover to cover
- Read a book. Full stop.
- Install Windows 7 and restore the settings and data
- Buy a MBP
- Get Crystal Glaze protection
- Buy a Wii

Hopefully when I come back to this list at end of the holidays I’ll have achieved much of this!!

Provided I don’t have such a wild day.

Deluge

It rained a lot last night and this morning, causing random pools of water in various gutters.

Driving down Springvale Rd there was a bad car behind me, just going too fast for the weather. It came close behind me, ready to overtake. I had space before the car in front, so I could watch them quite safely in the rear view mirror. I saw the signal come on, I looked forward again, the car just in front to my left at that moment just shaved a puddle and threw water to the middle lane which I was in.

The bad car behind me signaled left, went into that puddle at about 80km/h, and just as it passed me and went through the puddle, I was exactly adjacent to them.

I braced myself, turned my head, scrunched my eyes (using orbicularis oculi) tapped the brake slightly, gripped the steering wheel tighter with my right hand, and slammed the heel of my left hand into the horn.

Then all was fine in the next moment, but really it sucked. I got pounded by water but didn’t get wet… the car is a funny unit.

Whirlwind

A few hours ago I woke from the longest sleep I’ve had in at least a year. Hit the mattress at 10pm, and woke at 6:40am, and lay around till about 8:45. I don’t get to do that any more, there was a stage during the year I had to be moving for seven days in a week for about two months. That was really tiring.

What caused me to need to sleep for so long was the enormous day I had two days ago, followed by a restless night attempting to sleep in thirty degree heat, backed up by being hammered at a work trial.

So here is the start of Wednesday.

I woke nice and early after finishing exams the day before, thinking the Eastern freeway would be a gentle crawl through Alexandra Pde. But wonderfully, with a passenger in the car I remebered the envious T2 lane, and zipped all the way through to arrive half an hour early. Messed around for half an hour in the adjacent park, had a play with the sundial. That was an interesting gadget.

Moved on to the interview at a relatively exclusive chocolate cafe chain. The Lygon St store was ethereal. Formerly one of those neat little townhouses converted into a cafe, it had almost a ghastly aura to it. I don’t know how to describe it, but it was really very nice. The interview went okay, I got stuck on the questions where I was asked what my referees would say about me if they were to be dialled.

Then decided to visit the places that I haven’t been to in the best part of half a year. Devoured some Brunetti’s. Yum. Had a bit of a peek around Smith St, found some stuff that doesn’t fit terribly well. Victoria St was the next stop for lunch, found the restaurant that I haven’t been to for a while, and had my old-time favourite meal. It wasn’t as good as it used to be, but nice to have nonetheless.

Drove to Doncaster to escape the heat. When I got into the carpark there, I found a spot, but I also had a phone call. A phonecall for a trial. Wooooo! Indeed major excitement right at that moment. While on the phone I had cars horning me because I’d pulled over right next to a vacant parking spot. BUT I had a job trial right then and there.

All this was somehow shared with someone slightly special. What I want to say to this is that endless days are the most special thing ever … but making them count means more.

When my mum got back from work at night, we went out for dinner. I really wasn’t hungry, indeed I was very full after the day’s massive calorie/kilojoule consumpution. Luckily I wasn’t bloated, or I would have wasted my parents money in going out for dinner in the first place. Dinner was nice.

tbc if i can be bothered.

It is this

nancy says (21:10):
*like falling in love
*with someone new
*the thrill of the chase
*and then discovering their little love quirks
*and being wooed and everything feeling new and amazing and surprising and mysterious
*and feeling invincible cos your serotonin levels are like sky high
*and staying up all night and waking up at the crack of dawn
*and your immune system is like triple strength
*because of some other chemical

Shocking Delight

Emirates Melbourne Cup 03/11/2009.

Saturday was Derby day and on the news that night, my dad and I saw Shocking tear up the field from behind with a lot of toe to win by a few body-lengths. Immediately after the race I heard the commentators talking about how Shocking was to be a Melbourne Cup runner, and that it would be two kilograms lighter than it was in the Derby run. I remarked to my dad that he should buy this horse, as he seems to always buy the horses that run the race from the front of the pack.

So now to the big race. The race itself was rather uneventful, Wawringa (sp?) led basically the whole race and poor Damien Oliver went from winner one year, to finishing last the next. It’s like you waste a minute of your life watching the horses complete the first 2800m, so at the last bend the moves were being made. With 300m to go i heard the caller utter “Shocking after Crime Scene in the lead…” and I got out of my chair to get a closer look at the TV screen. I found number 21 and it was making fast ground on Crime Scene, just a neck away from its nose. The horse had come from about halfway to two-thirds of the way to the back, and mounted its attack laterally against a strong headwind to break to the lead. I was then shouting at my dad that his horse was right there, and going to win the cup. With 50m to go, Shocking had put itself a neck in front… then the horses passed the finish line and Shocking won by one length. I was so excited!! and my dad was still confused as to whether he’d won!! But it was probably because I was shouting and being all excited… He did hear the race caller utter that tell-tale line.

So it’s been several uneventful years in Melbourne Cup betting for us, so it’s nice to get a small win, albeit minor as he bought the early favourite (Viewed) and another horse starting with Z as well.